Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Chapter One: Finding My Way Home

I stood in front of my Father's office nervous and unsure if I was ready for this.

You see, I had run away from home. I thought that I knew better than my Father and had left, only find out that I was wrong. The world was cruel to me, unwelcoming and, though fun at first, the fun faded away and that's when I got the letter, from one of my siblings, telling me about Jesus. Jesus was my Father's son and I had never really been close to Him, but knew that He was a real good-two shoes. He never did anything wrong. But I found out that after I left, He went to Father and asked to be punished for me. He went in my place and asked for my punishment and Father did it. Father punished Him.

Jesus took the blame for me and when I wrote back asking why, I was told He did it because He wanted to and because He loves me, just like Father does. It was in that moment that realized I didn't want to be bad anymore. I loved Jesus too and I loved Father, but I wasn't doing a very good job of showing that. I had to own up to my responsibility.

So I came back and here I was, in front of my Father's office, wanting to apologize. But my guilt was killing me. What if it was too late?


What if He was angry with me that He didn't want to forgive me?

I gulped. I couldn't think that way, Father had always said that if I knock, his door will open so...I did it. I knocked.

There was no sound at first and I started to panic, feeling my nerves grating on my confidence, when the door slowly opened and a voice called from within. "Come in."

Taking a breath I walked into the room and saw my Father sitting at His desk. He looked up from His work and smiled waving at me to come closer and I obeyed. "You're back" He said to me, though He didn't sound surprised nor smug, as if he expected me to fail in the world. It simply a statement before continuing, "You've been gone a long time. Some of your siblings were convinced you weren't ever coming back."

At this a dropped my gaze, "I know." I muttered, "I'm sorry."

He didn't say anything else in that moment, just came around the table and took me into His arms, like He knew I needed comfort, and gave me a kiss on my forehead, "The important thing," He said, "Is that you are here now. Why did you come back?" I pulled away from Him and sighed, feeling my guilt coming back, but, none the less, prepared myself to say what I needed to be said.

"I heard what Jesus did for me and it made me realize that I don't want to be bad anymore and I don't want to fight you anymore. I've missed you. I want to spend more time with you and I'm so sorry for all the things that I've done. Please can you ever forgive me?"

I winced back almost preparing myself for Him to get angry and refuse, but no such thing came. Instead I felt Him take hold of my hand and bring my gaze back to Him. He was smiling. In fact He looked really really happy and nodded, "Yes, I forgive you. All you had to do was ask." I was blown away. It was that easy? That was all I had to do? "But...aren't you going to punish me too?" He pulled me into His arms once again and sighed, "No, Jesus took the punishment so that you wouldn't have to."

At this I looked up at him, "So that's...it?"

And He nodded, "That's it. You have been spared and forgiven." With that He took my face in His hands and I felt myself overwhelmed by emotion. Tears ran down my face as He wiped them away and whispered, "No more tears. No more crying. Today is a day of celebration because you have finally been found."

I nodded and gripped Him back saying to Him "I love you. I do. I love you so much." And as He hugged me again I stood there, relishing in the fact that I was here with Him in my home. "I love you too," He said to me, "And I've been waiting for you to come home"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jesus took the blame for me and He took the blame for you. We deserved a punishment worse than death and instead we are given life in Heaven with God. There is no fine print. There is no catch. There is just sacrifice given for our sake so that we won't have to pay the price. Our God is a loving and just God who wants you to come home. But you have to find the strength and the courage to do so or else you'll be forever lost.

-penman


No comments: