My Faith Will Stay

¹Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, and Timothy our brother,

²To the holy and faithful brothers in Christ at Colosse:
Grace and peace to you from God our Father.

Thanksgiving and Prayer

³We always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you, ⁴because we have heard of your faith in Christ Jesus and of the love you have for all the saints— ⁵the faith and love that spring from the hope that is stored up for you in heaven and that you have already heard about in the word of truth, the gospel ⁶that has come to you. All over the world this gospel is bearing fruit and growing, just as it has been doing among you since the day you heard it and understood God's grace in all its truth. ⁷You learned it from Epaphras, our dear fellow servant, who is a faithful minister of Christ on our behalf, ⁸and who also told us of your love in the Spirit.

⁹For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. ¹⁰And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, ¹¹being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully ¹²giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you^d]"> to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light. ¹³For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, ¹⁴in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

The Supremacy of Christ

¹⁵He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. ¹⁶For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. ¹⁷He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. ¹⁸And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. ¹⁹For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, ²⁰and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.

²¹Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of^f]"> your evil behavior. ²²But now he has reconciled you by Christ's physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation— ²³if you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope held out in the gospel. This is the gospel that you heard and that has been proclaimed to every creature under heaven, and of which I, Paul, have become a servant.

Paul's Labor for the Church

²⁴Now I rejoice in what was suffered for you, and I fill up in my flesh what is still lacking in regard to Christ's afflictions, for the sake of his body, which is the church. ²⁵I have become its servant by the commission God gave me to present to you the word of God in its fullness— ²⁶the mystery that has been kept hidden for ages and generations, but is now disclosed to the saints. ²⁷To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.

²⁸We proclaim him, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone perfect in Christ. ²⁹To this end I labor, struggling with all his energy, which so powerfully works in me.

In the recent events that have conspired, the first chapter of Colossians really spoke to me. In reading this chapter I thought about CFBC and how this chapter said everything that I have wanted to say to my church about what I think God is calling me to do and what He is teaching me. And how, though unconventional my acts of praise to Him are, they come from my heart and they are driven by my desire to continually remind everyone around me about God's grace and providence.

²⁴Now I rejoice in what was suffered for you, and I fill up in my flesh what is still lacking in regard to Christ's afflictions, for the sake of his body, which is the church. ²⁵I have become its servant by the commission God gave me to present to you the word of God in its fullness—

Moving on to everything else...

[I plan to blog about the musical itself, but first and foremost I would like to talk about what God has taught me through it and just the reminders He has given to me]

There were many moments throughout the last few months where I questioned why I was doing what I was doing. Why had I chosen to put myself and those I around me, whom I loved, through all of the stress that comes with big, ambitious projects? But, in the aftermath, I think I have come out with a better understanding of what God wants from me.

ACTS OF FAITH was always a story about the Christian life. It presented the Gospel, but moreover it was about Christian living and how being a Christian does not make life easier. In fact, at times it is really hard to be Christian, especially in a world like today.

Even more, I think I wrote this musical for the youth of CFBC and the youth from other churches that I've encountered over the course of the past few years. I've seen so many falter and stray away from the path to the Cross. I've seen kids turn completely away and others who stand stagnant all because they are afraid to ask for help, they are afraid to be seen as Christians with dead faith, so...they keep quiet. Suffering (seemingly) alone so that they don't have to really deal with it. As long as no one else is aware, they can pretend that neither are they.

I know what that's like, feeling like you know the right answer, but not knowing why you can't apply it and afraid to ask for help because, then others might look at you and say, "aren't you Christian? shouldn't you know?" It feels shameful. As somebody who knows who God is, not being able to see Him makes you feel guilty and that begins the spiral down.

You want to breakdown, but you don't want to admit that God isn't the center, because you know He's supposed to be. You know He's supposed to be the driving force of your life and, when He isn't, what does that make you?

A liar?

A Hypocrite?

A fake?

A poser?

Yeah. I've felt that way too. That has always been one of my greatest fears, being called out as a fake. To have someone look at me and say, "You're a Christian? Yeah right. Quit fooling yourself 'cause you're not fooling me." Ouch. Talk about a nightmare.

Even God says in Psalms 26:4 "I do not sit with deceitful men, nor do I consort with hypocrites"

But, God is so good to us. Even though we may find it hard to forgive ourselves, nothing is impossible or difficult for God. He forgives us even after we've turned away. And He continues to wait until we come back, because if we truly truly desire to be fulfilled by Him, He'll know that. He knows that.

You want proof?

The book of Jeremiah talks about the prophet Jeremiah and how he was striving to help the Jewish people repent their sins and turn back to God. He told them of the threats that were coming for their kingdom and how if they just look to the Lord He will save them, but they didn't want to. They shrugged him off and after a while Jeremiah became angry with the futility of if all. Finally God tells him to stop praying for His people and Jeremiah goes a little crazy, making His proclamations more pronounced and out there. He is taunted and picked on and eventually gets thrown in jail; even in a pit to be left for dead.

Now, I was reading through chapter 33, and I found this amazing: God had told Jeremiah to stop praying for the Jews and He shared with Jeremiah all that would happen when He hides His face from them. The destruction will be horrible and so great, but...He says that He will heal them. He says:

⁶ " 'Nevertheless, I will bring health and healing to it; I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security. ⁷ I will bring Judah and Israel back from captivity and will rebuild them as they were before. ⁸ I will cleanse them from all the sin they have committed against me and will forgive all their sins of rebellion against me. ⁹
Then this city will bring me renown, joy, praise and honor before all nations on earth that hear of all the good things I do for it; and they will be in awe and will tremble at the abundant prosperity and peace I provide for it.'
Jeremiah 33:6-9

Don't you see? The greatest gift of God is His never-failing love and His faithfulness to us. One of my favorite lines in the entire musical is one of Amy Phu's lines where she says, "God is faithful to those are faithful." And that's so true. Even when we fail Him, even when we falter and stumble, He sees us and He promises to heal us.

And we may feel guilty over our shortcomings but guilt does not discount us from God. Guilt and conviction remind us that we need Him and even when we don't feel worthy the point isn't about what we feel, it's about who God is.

Going back to Colossians 1:

²¹Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. ²²But now he has reconciled you by Christ's physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation— ²³if you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope held out in the gospel. This is the gospel that you heard and that has been proclaimed to every creature under heaven, and of which I, Paul, have become a servant.