More about saving my own life...

The past few weeks have been full of me trying to fit in "catch up" time with everyone I can think of, since school hasn't started for me yet and I'm free as a bird until mid-September. But this past week I found everyone else busy and myself with no one to "catch up" with.

So what did I do? Rent movies from Redbox of course! And in God's all-knowing goodness He made sure there wouldn't be anyone to distract me from finding and watching this movie:

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Story plot?

The film tells the story of Jake Taylor, a young man who has it all: a basketball scholarship, the ideal girlfriend, and the right friends. But faced with the demands of the in-crowd, Jake has written off his childhood best-friend, Roger. Isolated and mistreated, Roger finally takes his anger to the extreme when he shows up one day on campus with a gun.

Jake's last-ditch effort couldn't stop Roger. The events which follow start to change Jake's world forever. He begins to question everything. Most of all, he is unable to stop asking: "Could I have saved Roger?"

In his search for answers, Jake finds himself looking for the next Roger.

He reaches out to geeks, losers, and loners. However, crossing the strict high school caste lines threatens everything Jake values. It also pushes him to answer the most important question of all: What do I want my life to be about?

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This movie completely blew me away.

I mean, I've always loved Samuel Goldwyn Films, (the people responsible for Fireproof. Facing the Giants, etc. ) but "To Save A Life" is definitely a movie that surpassed my expectations. It addressed a lot of the problems young people face these days from drug and alcohol abuse to premarital sex to teen suicide and hazing even fear of the future. And what impressed me even more is that it addressed one of the biggest problems in the church regarding youth: kids who come to church out of habit and tradition rather than because they truly believe.

There is one portion of the movie that really sticks out in my mind and is the basis of this blog.

Jake Taylor, the main character, brings his girlfriend to Bible study for the first time and she quickly leaves feeling as though a lot of the girls (who go to school with her) were looking at her and passing judgement on her. She felt uncomfortable and like an outcast causing for her to want to leave.

When Jake returns to the Bible study after unsuccessfully trying to get her to stay he comes in time for the Youth Pastor to ask everyone for a moment of silence to reflect on Roger (Jake's old friend) and his suicide. He talks about how Roger had come to their Bible study the week before and wonders if maybe they had really opened up their arms to him he might still believe.

It's then during the "moment of silence" that Jake realizes that most of the kids in the room are not really paying attention. They continue to whisper under their breaths about school and their "regular" lives and it just throws him, causing him to lash out in anger
saying to all of them:

"Why come here if you don't let this change you?!"

And that spoke straight to me. It was a powerful thought and a powerful question made even more so by the fact that Jake (at this particular moment in the movie) was a non-believer. Someone who was coming looking to be changed or for a change.

I mean, we've all experienced those moments when we get fed up with people who just make the same mistakes over and over again and don't do anything to do better next time. But how often do we realize when we're the ones doing it? When we're the ones that keep making the same mistake or the ones that can't seem to change our ways? Maybe we're the ones that don't want to change our ways?

What about those people who can feel like there is something missing in their lives and so they come to church looking to be changed. How do we compare? Should we really be any different? Should we ever stop striving to be changed and transformed by the Gospel?

Gah. I don't know. I've just been thinking about it a lot lately and the bottom line of "To Save A Life" has just been echoing in my head.

"What do I want my life to be about?"

God.

That's what I want my life to be about. I want my life to be dedicated to Him and I don't want to be idle anymore. I don't want to stop changing and growing.

That's my prayer for this year. And I praise God so much for reminding me of that.